Warning readers: this blog is going to be as entertaining as your first time at third base. Don't fool yourself into thinking it was fun.

I have Fine Young Cannibals finest "I've Been Thinking About You" stuck in my head. Target must've had it playing at a level so low while shopping this afternoon the tune sucked on to my subconscious like a desperate vulcher. Why god, why?

That's not the only thing I walked away with from the discount store visit. I took a chance on what looked like a mouth watering Italian sausage, compliments to the Target snack bar chef, and now I am regretting that choice. What goes down should never come up. Sure the thing was tasty when I consumed it 3 hours ago but now I find myself having to swallow the semi processed meat for the second time. Indigestion = no friend of mine.

I have a new theme song. It's Spoon's Two Sides/Monsieur Valentine. Don't go stealing it. It peps me up. With SAD right around the bend I have been battling the end of summer blues. We know what's next: fewer daylight hours and cooler temperatures. Have I mentioned how much I loathe cold weather? To spice things up a bit allow me to share with you dogs a couple of exciting things I learned over the past week: (a) yes it's possible to be solicited for sex in a grocery store parking lot on a Thursday afternoon by a homosexual and (b) never mistake the small little blue pills for ibuprofen unless you have time to devote to a coma.

One of those "getting to know your friends" chain emails went around today. Of course it was the one hundredth time I was getting to know this particular group of friends but I threw caution to the wind and signed up for the challenge. I was stumped, I guess for the one hundredth time, by question #38: "Do you like surprises?" Profound I know. Quiz wizard I need clarification. Is this the "SURPRISE Happy 28th Birthday Party" kind of surprise or the "what do you mean there are 2 plus signs" kind of surprise? Two totally different things.

But honestly, I deal with a wide range of surprise daily. I was surprised when I went with the new fire taco during a hunger peak leaving me sadly disappointed. I am surprised by what my dreams try to tell me night after night through variations of the same dream. I am surprised to see things run smoothly when I expect a disaster. I was recently surprised to learn I do like a song off of Thom Yorke’s two year old disaster Eraser. I am surprised that a legit record producer signed on Heidi Montag. I am surprised that at 33 I still struggle differentiating left from right. I am surprised that some things keep getting better and better. I am surprised when I make it home after the gas needle has been pushing E for a day or two. I am surprised for every horrible song out there, and they are plentiful, at least one person in this world claims it as their favorite. What a wonderful world!

Fitness: it's what I am [trying to be] all about. I'd like to take a moment and share with you several photos captured during a trial run as a personal trainer. I think you'll like them.
























You see, exercise is much more enjoyable and not the slightest bit painful when you've consumed more than 3 alcoholic beverages. You hardly remember the effort! The next morning you wake up asking yourself "why am I so sore" and as the dreariness and headache vanishes "oh yeah - cardio coolers." Sure we look like a group of circus monkeys in that last one but fitness should be entertaining. My last photo is saying "try not to get stuck in a fitness rut - keep things interesting."

Going to win some money tonight dirty dogs...Poker [bunko]. NIGHT!