so long farewell

auf Wiedersehen, good night.

dear blogspot,

I'm three seconds away from puking on my desk...

...daily multi vitamin. To add insult to injury I think I ate some bad turkey roni. The 'ole head between the knees trick works. 9th grade Health class wasn't a complete waste of time afterall.

On a less exciting note, following 48 hours of brutal anxiety I finally received my first at-home B12 shot (I am a B12 junkie) administered by a non medical professional. What a trooper that Matthew, such a care free spirit. I watched as, after 2 days of my badgering stemming from a strong need to diminish distress and craving reassurance, Matt's confidence crippled to the point where he refused to inject me in the rear on Monday night suggesting we'd "give it a try" another night. This statement was made about the time I was thrown into a full blown panic attack while watching a nurse via the likes of youtube demonstrate the proper way to execute the deed. Readers beware, t'was not the needle that frightened me, it was the way ms. prick critically stressed the life or death importance of inserting the needle in the muscle avoiding any nerves. To add fuel to this growing fire, someone at work put the lethal combination of needle and heart attack in my head and it's all I thought about for 2 days. I convinced myself the second the syringe met my skin my heart would explode. Alas, last night my fear was conquered enough to go for round two. Once I could keep my paws to myself, the meds were sucked into the needle followed with several flicks to remove air and without a pinch I was suddenly B12 replenished. Like a child I sniffled "did you do it?" I hate to brag on the non-nurse, but Matthew did a first-rate job. Heck, I'd go as far to say he's the the best B12 administrator I have been pricked by, medical professionals and all, in three years. Thanks tigercat.

Here is a little something I have been working on creatively titled "I'm Just a Girl"...

I’m Just a Girl who believes love is about wanting to better yourself for someone else
I’m Just a Girl who is a victim to insecurity yet exudes with confidence
I'm Just a Girl who is terrified of awkward predicaments
I'm Just a Girl who is great at a few things spectacular at nothing
I’m Just a Girl who would rather cheat with a cigarette than a slice of cake
I’m Just a Girl who loves who I am yet disgusted with someone I have been
I’m Just a Girl who’s easy to please and easily annoyed
I’m Just a Girl always looking for something new but habitually complacent
I’m Just a Girl who says screw foolish expectations
I’m Just a Girl who wants the 9 oz steak over the 6
I’m Just a Girl who forgot what my 20 something self was like yet feel 19 at heart
I’m Just a Girl who has come to learn things do get easier with age yet some things never change
I’m Just a Girl who is a skeptical believer
I’m Just a Girl intrigued by what’s next
I’m Just a Girl who prefers the mysterious power of music over any form of art
I’m Just a Girl who understands life really does go on
I’m Just a Girl who loves to play but pensive at the core
I’m Just a Girl with a handful of dear friends oblivious to her enemies
I'm Just a Girl with zero tolerance for fake
I'm Just a Girl who wants to forgive and then forget
I’m Just a Girl who prefers to go commando
I’m Just a Girl who will say I don’t care what you think, but might consider it
I’m Just a Girl who has learned the hard way
I’m Just a Girl who feels sorry for closed minded people
I’m Just a Girl who has left my past in the past
I'm Just a Girl with a man sized appetite
I'm Just a Girl who loves to endulge in a daydream
I’m Just a Girl who appreciates the benefit of the doubt
I’m Just a Girl who gives without expectation
I’m Just a Girl who does extraordinary things with her mind
I’m Just a Girl tempted by curiosity, better suited not knowing
I'm Just a Girl who adores alone time but believes being lonely is the saddest emotion
I’m just a Girl who is wise yet still learning
I’m Just a Girl often misunderstood
I’m Just a Girl who believes we all sometimes dream of frolicking on someone elses’ grass
I’m Just a Girl complicated but true
I'm Just a Girl who gets lost in a song
I’m Just a Girl with a razor sharp edge
I’m Just a Girl who sometimes needs rescuing from my thoughts
I’m Just a Girl who has learned some people change their situations, never change their ways
I’m Just a Girl in love.

I am out for a long weekend. As John Landis would write, See You Next Wednesday!

Lata snakes. ~ j