lets get ready to ramble

I suffer from an embarrassing ailment today known as the eye twitch. Not to worry, it is hardly recognizable but noticeable by touch. I have formed two theories on how such spasms came to be – overdose of caffeine or an overwhelming amount of stress. I dare to make contact with another in fear he, or worse she, will suggest I am being flirty. As such, life goes on. I have never heard of anyone suffering from a chronic case of eye twitch that failed to go away. Or have I? Nowadays your every day google search generates at least one perverse result. Who knew eye twitch was a sexual position. When I did find something of the medical persuaion I was stunned to find a testimonial that read “I had an eye twitch in my lower lid for almost 2 weeks straight!” I'm fucked! Fellow hypochondriacs trust me on this - stay away from those webmd bastards. Before you know it you are self disagnosing your tension headache as Metastatic Carcinoma.

I find it remarkably sexy when a man passionately grabs a woman by the back of her head and pulls her in for a maddening session of tongue tennis. You know, the kind of kiss that takes your breath away. Two faces meshing together like pb&j. Sigh.

Someone with chester cheetah paws has left his mark on my keyboard. Oh yes, t'was me.

Front or back door. - pap smear or lower GI? Lesser of two evils? Out of the two, what do you consider to be a more uncomofrtable procedure? The prep for the GI involves a lot of messy work and restricts one to their bathroom for hours possibly an entire evening. There is minimal prep for the pappy outside of a little extra hygiene perhaps a little trim. The question that begs to be answered - which is worse to perform? I hate it when the administrator of such procedure promotes casual conversation in an attempt to lessen the awkwardness "how was your summer?" It is most eerie if said convo is prompted during the breast examination. It's got to be horrific for that person who thought she was signing on for a nursing gig but really her primary duty is to be the legally required third party to all examinations - unless she gets off on such sick shananigans - and in that case get out of my examination room.

I am tired but mistaking sleepiness for hunger. I am giddy but have nothing to gush over. I am a little sad but I gave up negativity for Lent (go Jesus!) and overall ready for a warm bed and lovely dreams.

Cheers to all and to all goodnight!

jsass